Dead Man Talking
by Sanoon
Summary: During a walk in the park, Dib meets someone strange. Who is this man who believes him? Will he be able to help Dib in his attempts to capture Zim?
1. You Don't Know Jack

Disclaimer – I don't own Invader Zim

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A Ghost's Whisper  
By Sanoon

Chapter 1: You Don't Know Jack

Dib was walking down the Hurt park trail, smiling broadly and humming a giddy tune. Although not the direct way home, the paranormal investigator decided to take the long way today. The sun was setting, giving off an orange glow on the horizon. The leaves on the trees were pure green on the warm July day, and the birds were calling out to each other. No one else seemed to be in the park this evening, as the paths, playing equipment, and pond were all devoid of human activity. The boy in the black trench coat didn't mind though. Nothing could ruin the greatness of the day he had.

Dib thoughts were consumed by the day's earlier events. It was this day that he finally got footage of Zim out of his poorly made human disguise talking to his leaders. Sure, Dib had gotten footage of Zim in all of his alien glory before, but something always prevented him from displaying this knowledge to the world. Whatever it was, a bird that would come out of nowhere and snatch the video recorder away, Mysterious Mysteries not believing him, a mutated rodent eating his recorder, or even his own recklessness that caused him to drop his camera into an Endless Hole machine his father had created for some reason, had always complicated his goals. No, today his camera came out unscathed, and Dib finally had the hard proof he needed to prove to the world that Zim was an evil alien.

Down the path, a bench seemed to appear, from seemingly nowhere, next to a path light. Dib stopped to stare at the bench for a minute. He could have sworn that he had never seen a bench there before during any of his other outings to the park. The bench was completely made out of wood, unlike the other benches at the park, which were made from a strong plastic. The light brown paint on the wooden bench that Dib was currently staring at was starting to chip, revealing its true oak color underneath. Despite the oddity of the bench, Dib was a little tired from all of the running, sneaking, and advanced acrobatic moves he did today, and thought a break would do him good. That, and he felt drawn to it for some reason.

"Just a short rest," the boy said as he pulled out a data chip and held it into the air, "and then it's off to home to duplicate this video," Realizing the incredible risk he was taking, he shoved the chip back into his coat and looked around the sky. No mysterious birds.

Dib took a seat on the bench and leaned back, taking in the comfort of the scene before him. A beautiful small pond, with the sunlight gleaming off of it set across the path. He remained like this for a short time, before deciding that he had rested enough. It was time to stop Zim's horrible evil before he could do anything else. Before he could stand up, he heard the sound of shoes hitting against the asphalt path. There was someone else in the park.

Dib glanced over to observe who was making the sound. The sound was made by a man in a large, light brown, almost tan trench coat walking towards him. His hands were in his pockets, and he was wearing a hat that Dib had only seen used in old movies. His face was concealed by the darkness produced by his hat. In essence, the man looked like he was ripped out of the 50's and thrown into a futuristic society. It wasn't easy to pick out the oddities about the appearance of the man since the setting sun had cast his left side in darkness, and his right side wasn't in Dib's full line of view.

When the man got close to the bench, he stopped to look at the boy. The darkness that covered the man's face cleared away, and Dib could see that the man had a nasty scar on his right cheek. "Is this seat taken?" the man asked Dib.

"Ah…no. Go ahead," Dib replied slowly as he observed the man's appearance. The sun had almost completely disappeared from view, and the lamps along the path had slowly turned on.

"What a day," the man said calmly, relaxing on the bench a little. He pulled out a pack of cigarettes and pulled out one of the white nicotine sticks. "Do you mind?" the man asked, holding the cigarette in front of his mouth. The man's voice was calm and peaceful.

"I don't mind," Dib replied as he glanced at the cigarette. Dib wanted to leave, not because of the man, but because he wanted to send the video to all the other members of the Swollen Eyeball network. But for some odd reason, Dib couldn't compel himself to leave the bench.

The man pulled out a match, struck it on his shoe, and then lit his cigarette. He took a few puffs. The two sat there for what seemed like forever before the older man took a deep breath and said, "These days are good, huh?"

"You wouldn't believe how good they are," Dib replied, smiling broadly as he stared at the moon's reflection on the pond, which had taken its place in the sky a while ago.

"Wouldn't I?" the man chuckled. "What did you do today that gave you such a happy smirk?" the man asked casually.

"I got proof of an actual alien living among us, and now I'm going to send that proof to members of the Swollen Eyeball Network," Dib answered happily. His eyes widened for a second before turning to the man next to him and saying, "That's my secret society, don't tell anyone." The man laughed quietly and nodded his head. "You don't believe me, do you?" Dib asked in response to the man's chuckle.

"I believe you," the man answered.

"You…you do?" the boy asked with a raised eyebrow. "That's strange. Nobody believes me. Although, the last person who said he believed me was my school guidance counselor. He ended up leaving earth with a few Plakoosians."

"Really?" the man chuckled. "You don't have to worry. I believe you 100" The man took another puff from his cigarette.

"Who are you?" Dib asked.

"Name's Jack," the man answered. "And what would your name be?"

"Dib…something. But that's not important. Are you another paranormal investigator?"

"Me?" Jack laughed. "I never really took a fancy for the paranormal. No, I was a private detective."

"Was?" Dib questioned.

"Let's just say I wasn't cut out for the assignment," Jack said with a tiny hint of sadness in is voice.

"So you quit?" Dib asked.

"I didn't want to, but I was kind of forced to," Jack answered. "Say, why don't you tell me a little bit about that alien you mentioned earlier?"

Dib raised an eyebrow to the man's question. Did someone really want to hear Dib out? Maybe he was a member of the Swollen Eyeball Network? The man didn't remind Dib of anyone he know on the SEN. "You really want to hear it?" Dib asked.

"You bet. I want to know more about this little alien," the man said before taking another puff from his cigarette.

"Well, it first started over a year ago when I received this transmission from an alien world about…" the paranormal investigator explained to Jack.

An hour passed as Dib told the man everything about the Irken race. Every little secret about Zim was given freely. The sky was now filled with stars. The man had moved passed his first cigarette, and got out another from his pack. He sighed and rocked a little on the bench as he thought about the information he had heard. "Hmm," he muttered. "That is very interesting. And you are the only one who knows about him?"

"Yes…well, actually, my sister knows he's an alien, but nobody else does," Dib replied quickly.

"Do other members of the Swollen Eyeball Network know about Zim?" the man replied.

"I can't tell you unless you're actually a member of the Swollen Eyeball Network," Dib said quickly. "Sorry, but it's one of the rules of the organization."

"I understand," Jack replied. "Say, Dib, if you ever need any help, then I'll be happy to offer my assistance."

"Really?" Dib shouted in joy as he jumped off of the bench. "With your private eye skills, maybe we can capture Zim." Dib started to face off into a different direction. "Finally, I can show everyone how right I was all along. Wait," the boy said as he spun around, "how can I contact you?"

Jack stood up and faced in the direction of the path he was originally going when he first stopped at the bench. He tilted his head up and looked at the sky. "A big storms coming. I have to go. Don't want to get wet. You should do the same." Dib glanced up, and saw a few clouds gathering in the sky, cutting off the moon's view. "How can you contact me? If you need to talk again, I'll be here before the storm. See you later Dib."

"Before the storm? " Dib questioned. His mind was riddled with questions, but the sound of thunder in the background interrupted his thoughts for a second. The boy glanced back down the path to see Jack walking away silently. "Wait," Dib shouted. Without stopping, Jack lifted his right hand into the air and waved; not even turning around, and then put his hand back into his pocket.

"Dib!" Came an all to familiar voice. Dib sighed and glanced over his shoulder. Gaz was walking down the path. "Who are you talking to? I can hear you at least 30 feet away. Are you talking to yourself again?"

"I was talking to Ja-" Dib started, but stopped as he brought his head to his front to show her Jack, however, he had disappeared. The paths were fully illuminated by the path lights, and there is no way he could have walked away that quickly. "Where did he go?"

"I don't need to see your imaginary friends Dib," Gaz said cruelly. "Dad wants you home, now!"

"Yes Gaz," Dib answered as he started to follow his sister back home. Another thunderstorm started to cackle in the night sky.


	2. Late Night Surprise

Hello all. I'm back with another chapter. Although I didn't say it in the last chapter…actually…I didn't say anything…this story is my test to see if I can actually write for Dib. I know I have written for him in the past, but I wasn't confident with my abilities of him. So, I decided to write this to see if I could get Dib down to a near perfection. So please, in your reviews, could you tell me if I got Dib down right? Thanks, and enjoy!

Disclaimer – I don't own Invader Zim, however, Jack is mine.

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Dead Man Talking  
By Sanoon

Chapter 2: Late Night Surprise

The rain poured against the glass windows in Dib's room as the thunder pierced the ears of those who heard it. But these noises didn't stop the room's occupant from completing his important tasks. He sat away, typing on his computer, his camera hooked up to one of its many ports. He was trying to download the photos and video footage onto his computer, but the system was having difficulty with the camera for a peculiar reason, and couldn't seem to fix that problem easily. In response to this, the boy set up a task list for his computer to follow to fix the problem.

Once the boy felt satisfied with the tasks he had ordered his computer to do, he twirled around in his chair and lifted up one of the floating screens that he used to contact the Swollen Eyeball Network. With the press of a button, the screen flickered to life, displaying the Swollen Eyeball insignia.

A black figure replaced the insignia. It was a thin figure, with long, unkempt hair that streamed out in all directions. "What is it agent Mothman?" The figure asked, its voice worn and old.

"Agent Atomic Mind," Dib said happily. "I have proof showing that Zim is an alien."

"That's exciting news agent Mothman. The committee will be happy to see this proof. Where is it?"

"My computer is downloading the pictures and video now. I just wanted to prepare you for what you are about to see. It should be ready any minute."

"Very good," agent Atomic Mind stated happily. "I'm very curious to see the infamous Zim. Unlike most of the committee, I haven't seen much of him, but what I have seen is remarkable.

"Thanks agent Atomic Mind," Dib said, quite content. He glanced over to his computer. A quarter done. He needed some more time. "Say, how are your ghost trips coming along?" the boy added.

"Not so well," agent Atomic Mind responded. "The next part of my hunt will take me to Hurt park, and I don't really want to go there."

"Why not?"

"Well…it's somewhat of a long trip," agent Atomic Mind responded.

"But you took a weeklong trip to Egypt to see if you could find King Tut's ghost. Hurts Park should be no problem for you."

"No fooling you, agent Mothman," agent Atomic Mind chuckled. He sighed as his outline seemed to slump over. "Agent Mothman…the real reason I don't want to go to the park is because of my father."

"What do you mean?" Dib asked curiously.

Atomic Mind sighed again. "My father died in that park…a long time ago."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Dib replied, a small hint of sorrow in his voice.

"It was a long time ago," agent Atomic Mind replied. "I just fear that–" The lights turned off, the screen died and fell to the floor, and the computer shut down. Dib jumped up in shock, as he glanced around his dark room. Every now and then the lightning would light up the room for a split second. After a few seconds of waiting, Dib calmed down.

"Lightning must have struck the power box outside," Dib said to himself, trying to give a probable explanation why the power just went out. "Although I didn't hear lightning strike anything nearby." Dib sat back down and swiveled the chair around. He sighed when he stared at the spot where he believed the computer was. "I'll have to re-enter the instructions for the computer to fix the camera when the power comes back."

The boy glanced at his watch and hit the light button. The time displayed 12:43. Dib yawned and walked over to his bed. He pulled the covers away from the bed and laid down. The only noises currently being made were from the rain pounding against the windows, and the occasional thunder. However, another sound was also present. It was quiet, but Dib could hear it.

It was coming from the door. Like the sound of a bolt being removed. Suddenly, Dib's bedroom door fell over, pounding against the floor. Dib jumped up from his bed and stared at where his bedroom door was. He heard small footsteps, and water dripping onto his carpeted floor. "Who-who's there?" Dib asked quickly, as he trembled in shock and fear.

Lightning stretched across the sky, lighting up the room for half a second, but that was all Dib needed to see who had violated the privacy of his room. "Zim!" Dib shouted angrily, all shock and terror removing itself from his body, replaced by anger.

"Yes Dib, me!" Zim said from the other side of the room.

"So you cut the power!" Dib shouted out.

"I guess you're smarter than I took you for, Dib-stink. But I believe you have something that I need to destroy."

"Good luck finding my camera in the dark, Zim!"

"Stupid human!" Zim shouted in an insulting tone. "Unlike you, I can see perfectly in the dark with my vision goggles!" Dib clenched his teeth in anger, and Zim laughed upon seeing that. Man, if there were ever a time when Dib wished he had his night-vision goggles, it'd be now. "I can clearly see the camera is on the desk, next to your computer!" Dib could hear Zim's footsteps move towards his desk. Dib jumped out of bed and rushed towards the sound. The lightning at that moment really helped. He managed to slam Zim and push him into his wall.

The two fell to the floor. The Irken growled in anger as he and Dib jumped up. Zim quickly pushed the unsuspecting boy down and ran over to the table. The little Irken had to throw the chair out of the way and kick the monitor on the ground away from the desk. He yanked the camera out of the computer. A metal claw came out of his PAK, grabbed the camera, taking it to the protective innards of the PAK and turned around to leave. Dib was already standing up and, with the assistance of another strip of lightning, rushed Zim. However, the Irken saw this and dived at Dib. The two fell to the ground, with Zim on top, holding the boy down by the shoulders.

"You won't be able to stop me Zim," Dib muttered as he tried to push the alien off of him. "The world will soon know of your kind. You'll never be able to stop me!"

"Oh really, Dib-monkey?" Zim asked as an evil grin grew on his face. "If you won't give up, then I think I just might have to make you permanently shut up." The Irken's right hand released itself from Dib's left shoulder. Zim quickly moved his left hand and used his arm to cover Dib from his left shoulder, across his neck, and to his right shoulder. The boy tried to cough, as the alien's arm was actually suffocating him. Zim's hand reached for his side. Dib only wondered what he was reaching for. Another lightning bolt, however, showed him what Zim's hand was going to grab.

Zim was reaching for a holster on his side: A gun! Dib struggled even harder now to get up. The Irken's hand rested on the gun. He attempted to pull out the gun, but something must have caught it, as Zim growled and tried to pull harder, but to no avail. "Stupid thing!" the Irken shouted.

Suddenly, a hand grasped around Zim's neck, and violently lifted him off of Dib. The Irken was now floating above the floor, struggling to free the hand grasping itself around his neck.

"Zim!" an angry voice shouted. "I am trying to sleep! Go home and play with Dib later!" Gaz winded Zim back, and threw him out the window. The glass shattered, letting the rain into the room. Zim could be heard screaming until a metal shutter covered the open window.

Dib coughed as he sat up and rubbed his neck. "Thanks Gaz," he coughed. "Any longer and he would have–" The angry little girl grabbed her brother by the collar and lifted him off of the floor. She slapped him a few times, slammed him against the wall they were next to, and then threw him onto the wall next to his bed. The boy fell onto his soft bed as Gaz growled out these last lines, "Stay quiet Dib. It's 1:02, and I need my sleep!" The angry girl stormed out of the room as Dib rubed his shoulders in pain.

"Thanks Gaz," the boy muttered. "My camera…" Again, he had failed. Zim had escaped with his camera. He sighed and pulled the covers over his body. He'd deal with this unfortunate event tomorrow.

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No, no, no, Zim can't just open the door. He has to remove the hinges! 

Well…that could have gone much better for Dib. But at the least, he's still alive.

Thanks for reading, and review please!


	3. Dib and Gir's Day

Hello all, welcome back for another chapter of doom! Sorry for the late update, but I had some schoolwork and other complications occur to halt my progress. Enjoy the story!

Disclaimer – I don't own Invader Zim, but I do own Jack, because it's cool like that.

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Dead Man Talking  
By Sanoon

Chapter 3: Dib and Gir's Day.

The sun was shining brightly on the wet ground. The previous night's rainstorm had thoroughly made sure everything was coated in water. A certain paranormal investigator was already outside. His destination was that of an eerie place. A seemingly small house that hade a creepy green glow to it.

The boy had discovered how Zim had caused the power outage last night. The power box outside the house was destroyed internally, most likely due to one of his advanced alien devices.

The house drew near. Dib had played out the upcoming scene in his mind hundreds of times. Each outcome was slightly better than the last, yet also less believable. He would walk up to the house, hope the gnomes weren't activated again, sneak inside, retrieve the camera, and if possible, capture Zim. Yeah…that was an awesome plan.

Dib was now standing in front of the strange house. He held his breath, winced, and walked past the picket fence. Nothing. No strange lawn ornaments moved an inch, or even bothered to show interest in the boy. Dib let out his breath, opened his eyes fully, and smiled. Already going good.

But how to enter the house? It would take a long time to tunnel into Zim's base, and Gir didn't leave any windows open again. He would have to think hard about this one.

Dib slowly approached the door. Maybe he could creep through it and still remain unseen. He'd have to risk it. All that planning he did this morning and he forgot how he would enter. What a mistake.

His hand was a mere inch from the door handle. The knob suddenly turned and the door opened up. Gir stood before him in his dog costume, staring blankly at Dib.

"Hi, big headed boy!" Gir shouted, apparently happy to see Dib.

"Quiet Gir," Dib said quickly. "I'm trying to sneak into the house, ok?" Dib knew that he had just told Zim's robot that he was sneaking into his house, but the boy had come to realize a long time ago that Gir was completely incompetent and would more than likely help him out. It was actually mini-moose who was the threat to him.

"Okey-dokey!" Gir screamed.

Dib sighed. Man…Gir was so dumb. "Say, Gir, do you know where Zim is at the moment?" It never hurts to know where your opponent was at all times.

Gir saluted Dib and said in a more authorities tone, "Master's not here right now. He ordered me to guard the house." It took awhile, but Dib managed to get Gir to salute him. He did this mostly to annoy the little Irken once he figured it out.

"So where is he?" the boy asked as the disguised robot went back to his usual tone.

"Not here," Gir said, almost sounding as if he was having a hard time with speech.

"That's not helpful." Gir shrugged. "Okay, Gir," Dib said as he reached into his coat pocket. Dib knew how to make the robot talk. "What if I give you a candy bar?"

"Gimme!" Gir shouted as he snached the candy bar out of the boy's hand. The robot just shoved the whole thing into his mouth, not even removing the wrapper.

"Do you remember where he is?" Dib asked again.

Gir closed his eyes and thought really hard. "He…heeee…he's…give me a minute." Dib sighed. It usually doesn't take Gir this long to at least lie to him. "Oh…I remember now! He went to his satellite to conduct some sort of experiment!"

"Did he take my camera with him?" Dib asked as he produced another candy bar from his coat pocket.

Gir repeated the previous process, this time only answering a little faster. "Yes. He took your camera with him, and then went, HAHAGRAHHA!"

"I won't be able to get my camera if he has it in space…and who knows if he already destroyed it or not," the boy said to himself.

"I do!" Gir shouted happily.

"You know if he destroyed my camera or not? Did he destroy it?"

"CANDY!" Dib sighed and took out his last chocolaty delight, which Gir quickly consumed. "He destroyed it! Yep, he did!"

Dib threw his hands into the air in anger. "NO!" He shouted angrily. "I finally had it! I had it!" Gir walked out of the doorway, closed the door behind him, and walked past the angry boy. Dib's hands went back down to his sides as he glanced at the little robot. "Where are you going?" Dib asked.

"I'm going to get a Suck Monkey," Gir answered as he spun around. "Come with me. Come with me!"

"Maybe later," Dib replied, causing Gir to fall to the soaked pathway, crying insanely and muttering gibberish about Dib and slushies.

Dib sighed again. He knew the only way to shut up the robot would be to give in and go with him to get a Suck Monkey. "Calm down, Gir. I'll come with you." Gir's reaction was immediate. He stopped crying, jumped off of the soaked ground, and ran up to Dib, hugging him. This had to be the worst part for the boy.

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The store was mostly empty, except for the occasional teenager who would come in for a magazine and some candy. Gir and Dib sat one of the two tables that were built for the convenience of the customers. The little dog-disguised robot was sucking away madly at the chocolate-flavored Suck Monkey, while Dib just watched, constantly wondering where the little robot hid the food once he ate it.

The boy had already finished his sandwich he ordered, although Gir had taken half of it when he started whining. The last thing Dib wanted was to cause a scene with Gir.

You'd think that separating Gir from his master would have been a great chance for Dib to get some knowledge about the Irken's plans. That wasn't so, as Gir always made up false information about any questions Dib asked him, or at the least, fabricated too much false information to make it even remotely reliable. Short questions were one thing, but interrogations were another.

Dib glanced at his watch, and gasped in shock. It was already 5:20. He was originally going to try to get in contact with agent Atomic Mind to finish their discussion. Gir took notice to Dib's actions.

"What'cha lookin' at!" the robot shouted happily, almost jumping across the table to see the boy's watch.

"It's nothing Gir," Dib said, reeling back as the robot drew close. "I'm going to be going now. I have to go home."

"Take me with you! Take me with youuu!" Gir pleaded.

"I can't, Gir," Dib replied.

"But I want to go with you!" Gir shouted, causing everyone in the small building to glance at the two at the table. Their interests in them quickly died off however.

"Why?"

"Cause I want more free stuff!" The little dog-disguised robot gave Dib a big smile.

The boy shook his head and said, "Please Gir. You really should be getting back to your house before Zim gets back. Knowing Zim, he'd probably go-"

"I'm gone all the time," the little robot interrupted. "He won't care."

"What do you mean you're "gone all the time"?"

"WAFFLES!"

"Ok…I'm going home. Don't follow me, alright Gir?"

Gir saluted Dib again. The boy just shook his head and walked out of the gas station. Dib couldn't let Gir follow him home. Who knows what horrible things he'll do. Hopefully, agent Atomic Mind will be on the computer.

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Who here wouldn't agree that at some point, Gir would just follow Dib around? I know he would.

Originally, this chapter was going to be much longer, but I decided to cut if off here. Looks like this story won't be the four-five chapter story I was hoping for.

Thanks for reading, now review please


	4. Jack

Disclaimer – I don't own Invader Zim…But Jack is mine. Yeah…it's kinda like that.

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Dead Man Talking  
By Sanoon

Chapter 4: Jack

The soft wind grazed the house that a small boy with a big head walked into. He walked past his sister, who was sitting on the couch, absorbed in her latest game while the TV was on. He noted that the power was back as the TV weatherman talked about a thunderstorm that would be raging the area in the middle of the night. The boy quickly walked up the stairs.

He entered his room and sat at his computer desk. With the press of a button, the computer began booting up. He swiveled around in his chair and picked up the screen he had moved over to his computer this morning since Zim had kicked it out of the way last night. The eyeball insignia displayed itself on the screen as Dib turned the monitor on.

"You have _five_ new messages," a computerized voice announced. Dib turned to his computer and opened up his message box. Two of them were from agent Darkbooty, one from agent Swallowing Doppler, and another from agent Metal Blitz. These were most likely about the detailed report Dib had sent in to the SEN about the Irken social ladder. The fifth one was a message from agent Atomic Mind. Dib selected that one first.

The screen displayed the outline of agent Atomic Mind. "Agent Mothman, what happened?" His question was quick, and with concern. "Did you turn off the transmission?" He sighed. "Whatever the matter is, I want to finish what I was saying last night. I fear that the ghost in the park is my father. It was a tragic day. I…I just can't bear myself to go." There was a pause. "Agent Mothman…could you do an old man a favor and check out the park for me? Thanks. I'll try to get in touch with you later Dib." The screen returned to the SEN insignia.

"I wonder…" Dib said aloud as he rubbed his chin. "Could it be that-"

"Dib! One of your stupid friends is here!" Gaz yelled from the living room.

Never a moment of piece for a paranormal investigator. Dib jumped off of the chair and walked out of his room, and down into the living room.

"Hiya Dibby!" The disguised robot shouted as he ran into the living room from the kitchen holding a bag of popcorn.

"Gir!?" The boy said quickly. "Wha…what are you doing here?"

The robot snapped to attention, and his voice turned to his rare serious tone. "I am here to spy on you!"

"So…what did you find?" Gaz said from the couch, not really glancing at the robot or her brother.

"You're out of corn syrup!" Gir shouted, his voice back to normal, before eating the whole bag of popcorn.

"I'm sure Zim will be ecstatic about that new information," Gaz muttered. "Now go away so I can play in peace. That goes for you too, Dib."

"I'll be leaving then," Dib said calmly as he walked back to his room. Gir sneaked, or at least tried too, behind Dib.

The boy entered his room and grabbed a few supplies. Some snacks, some batteries, his cam…damn. He really wanted his camera back. He'd have to go out and get a new one as soon as possible, but he'd need to ask his dad for some cash next time he saw him.

"I'm spying on you!" Gir shouted from the doorway.

"That's getting annoying Gir," Dib said as he grabbed a book from his bookshelf. "Please stop it."

"Okay!" the little disguised robot said happily. Dib shook his head as he stared at the robot before putting the book he grabbed into his coat pocket. He headed out the door, picked up the heavy robot, and carried him downstairs. And out of the house. He dropped the machine on the pathway.

"Gir." The robot jumped up and snapped to attention. "I have to go to the park and meet someone. I want you to go-stop doing that!" Gir lowered his right arm to his side. "As I was saying, I want you to go home before Zim suspects anything. Ok?"

"I understand," Gir said sadly. His dog-ears slumped down to his head and he turned to walk away. Dib ignored the robots whimpering. If he didn't, then Gir would inevitably end up going to the park with him. The robot glanced back to see if Dib was falling for the ploy. Much to his dismay, however, Dib was already walking down the sidewalk. "AGHAAAA!" Gir cried as he ran away down the street.

He could hear the robot cry, but it was just that. A robot. Dib knew this, but he had to keep reminding himself that. It was almost like Gir was a child, capable of feeling emotions, much the opposite of his master.

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The park was filled with its average occupants. Kids, teens, adults, hobos, sideshow freaks and the like. Dib walked by all of these people as he made his way to an empty bench. Once a desirable location was found, he quickly made himself at home and pulled out the book he had put in his coat earlier. He had a few hours to kill, and he couldn't even remember the last time he read a book for the fun of it, mostly because of his hectic lifestyle.

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The sun had set, and the life forms that once inhabited the park like a virus now left for their warm homes…except for the hobos. They went back to the alleyways. Dib had put his book away due to the lack of light, and waited for Jack. "I hope Jack keeps his word," Dib muttered to himself.

There was a quick rustling in the bushes behind Dib. The boy quickly jumped up and shined a flashlight he had brought along on the bush. He sighed when he saw the creature hiding in the bush jump out.

"I'm a monster!" the disguised robot shouted happily. "Listen to me moo!"

"Not now, Gir," Dib spat out as he sat back down. "I have to wait here for someone. I just hope he shows up."

Gir giggled at the boy, while Dib just sighed. He sat back down on the bench, and waited with a scowl on his face.

"You look angry," Gir whispered as he stopped giggling.

"Why do you follow me, Gir?" Dib asked. "Did following Zim just get too boring?"

"Noooo," the robot hummed. "He doesn't give me candy."

The boy reached into his pocket and pulled out a candy bar, tossing it onto the ground. "Act like a dog for a little bit, okay? And tell me when Jack comes along."

"Yes sir," the robot said seriously, saluting the boy. He bent down on all fours and walked over towards the candy bar, eating it as a dog would.

For twenty minutes, the green dog acted like a dog for one of the few times it ever has while on Earth. He sat there, mindlessly staring off into the dark distance. Dib couldn't help but notice this from the corner of his eye as he lay down on the bench. Every time Gir was with Zim, the robot would do something strange, goofy, silly, or just plain weird. He never acted like what his costume suggested: A dog.

Maybe Dib had done something Zim couldn't. Maybe Dib had managed to make Gir remotely successful. Or maybe Gir was just messing around in new ways at strangely convenient times. If it was the first two, then Dib had secured another victory over Zim. If not…then at least Zim didn't have his helper…or maybe that was a bad thing?

"Hope you weren't waiting long," came Jack's voice. Dib jumped up and glanced at the man standing on the pathway.

"Jack…" Dib muttered. He glanced over to Gir, who was now looking at Dib as though he were insane. Not like that's the first time he has ever received that look.

"Yeah, it's me," Jack said, pulling his cigarette away from his mouth. "I got something for ya." He pulled something out of his trench coat. "Here." He tossed the item onto the boys lap.

Dib picked it up and looked at it. It was the data chip from his camera that Zim took last night. But how did he manage to obtain the chip if it was in Dib's camera in Zim's labs?

"Where did you get this?" the boy asked.

"My own ways, kid. My own ways," Jack replied, taking another toke of the cigarette.

"But how did you get into Zim's house?" Dib asked, somewhat demanding to know.

"Somehow, I have a feeling you already know, Dib."

"I think I might, but I need to know one more thing." Dib put the data chip into his pocket. "Did you die 50 years ago in this very park?"

Jack chuckled, slightly shaking his head. "You're a bright one Dib. You really are." Jack removed the fag from his mouth and tossed it on the ground, stomping it out with his shoe. "Because of that, I never intended to keep this a secret for long."

"So I'm right," Dib said, smiling at another achievement.

"Who are you talking to, big-headed boy!" Gir shouted from the side of the bench.

"Jack," Dib mumbled to the robot, smiling happily.

"It all started 50 years ago…" Jack began...

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Ooooo…freaky, eh? Thanks for reading, now review please. 


	5. Reminiscence

I think Dib might be a bit OOC at the end of the chapter. I'm not quite sure though.

Disclaimer – I may not own Invader Zim, but who here can say I don't own Jack?

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Dead Man Talking  
By Sanoon

Chapter 5: Reminiscence

It was a cold day near the end of October. Like I said last time we met, I was a private eye. I had recently finished a previous case about a madman who abducted little girls and tortured them for his own amusement. That man is still rotting in jail. 

_I was looking forward to some time off to spend with my family. I had a beautiful wife, and a smart and athletic 15-year-old son waiting for me at home. However, my job had always tended to get in the way of my family life. I had rarely gotten to see them at times._

_A recent string of murders was popping up all over the city._

_The public never saw the pictures of the victims, but I did. People were being found dead with holes seemingly vaporized out of their chests, cuts sliced across their skin, large objects impaled into them, and even to the extent of body parts forcibly removed. It was a gruesome sight. I was later approached by a representative of the mayor, who asked me to find the culprit. Part of me was dying to get the case, sorely because of the challenge. The other half said I was getting in too deep._

_I told him that I'd think about it. I haven't really spent a lot of quality time with my family recently, due to my previous case, so I was long overdue. However, the money that the mayor offered me for the job…it would allow me to get my son a gift for Christmas that he always wanted._

_I accepted the case the next day. I was given all of the police records concerning the killings. After sifting through the files, I had concluded that the killings had no prejudice intentions, since the victims were random in all cases. It was more like the person was at the wrong place at the wrong time. Thirteen were killed so far, some of them were in their own homes, and some were walking alone in Hurt Park. All of the murders happened after dark, so that would be when I go out to find him._

_For the next week, I had no leads. The murderer killed an additional four people in that time; he was good. He knew what he was doing. He left no trace, no evidence. I sat in my office, looking over the recent murder files. I noticed something then. The first murder happened at the home of Ms Patterson, a single mother. The next was in the park; the victim was Mr. Kintonburg, a veteran from WWII. The next was in another home, this time the victim was Jason Hinton, a high school athlete. The boy was on the same football team as my son. The pattern repeated in the same manor. The latest murder was at the home of Dr. Pelok. If the killer continues to follow this little pattern, then his next victim will be at Hurt Park, and that's where I'll be waiting._

_The sun had gone down, and I was sitting on one of the parks many benches. The moon was sitting on top of the star-filled sky, shining like I had never seen it shine before. With my lantern in hand, I decided to take a walk around the trails, keeping ever vigilant to the slightest noise that would alert me to another presence. I rounded the entire park, only to find nothing, like it was a ghost town. The criminal either wasn't in the park, or wasn't willing to show himself to me._

_I found the bench I started from and took a seat. I took out a cigarette and lit it with a match, a usual routine for me. The wind had picked up, and the cold October air made my skin shiver, so I pulled my trench coat tighter around my body._

_I took the cigarette from my lips and cupped my hands over my mouth so I could exhale some warm air onto them. That didn't do much. That's when I heard a rustling behind me as the bushes shook. I quickly jumped up and spun around, only to see a small creature, human in appearance, jump onto the bench that I was just sitting in. My hand instinctively went to my pistol. The creature looked up at me, and stared me square in the eyes, with grin a showing off its fearsome razor sharp teeth._

_This creature may have been able to pass for a human from afar, but it definitely was not a human being. It had a bloodstained, black and white striped shirt, black pants, and black gloves that covered three fingers, all of which covering its green skin. I know I saw some sort of canister of sorts attached to its back, with what could have been yellow dots on it. Its pure yellow eyes narrowed at me as I heard the thing growl. The two antennas on its head lowered, so they were laying flat against its almost rectangular head. You should have stayed home today, the creature growled at me. I drew my pistol as the creature jumped at me. I fired a shot, while it made a deep cut my right cheek. I fell backward onto the pavement, rolling over, cursing, anything to help ease the pain. My blood poured freely onto the cement. I could hear the creature next to me also shouting, but in a language I couldn't understand. I had managed to hold onto my gun the entire time, so I rolled over to shoot the monster. When I pointed my gun at it though, the monster kicked it out of my hand, sending it into the edge of the pond._

_The creature was only illuminated on its right side, and I could see that I had managed to shoot it in the arm. Green blood rolled down its tattered clothing. I then noticed how small the thing was. It was the size of a small boy. Standing maybe four feet high._

_The creature held in its hand a weapon of the likes I have never seen before, and it was aimed directly at me. Thunder bellowed out from the sky, as if demanding the creature to stop its act. It glanced up at the sky, watching the lighting streak across the clouds with concern. I used that to my advantage. From the ground, I leapt forward. However, the creature noticed more quickly that I would have hoped. Four long, metal, spider-like legs erupted from its backpack and lifted it into the air. I quickly stood up to grab the creature, but it fired it's weapon before I could pull him down. A light flared from the tip of the weapon and struck me in my left leg. I fell to the ground in pain. Then the creature lowered itself down to me and laughed at my futile attempts to stop him. That's when the first drop hit, causing the creature to make a short scream. The next drop hit me on my right cheek. More and more droplets hit the ground. The creature's skin seemed to be burning. If I weren't in so much pain from being shot in the leg, I would have attacked it again. Unfortunately...It still had its weapon. The creature quickly aimed it at my head, and sneered as it pulled the trigger._

_And that was the end. I was just another death from an unknown madman. I was the last one however. The creature never attacked another person after that night. I don't know why. I haven't figured it out._

_But I didn't move on. I was angry. Surprised. Horrified._

_I would never get to see my son graduate from high skool, watch him get married, or see my grandchildren. I wouldn't get to grow old with my beautiful wife. I would miss everything. And because of that, I wanted revenge. I wandered the planet looking for the creature that killed me. I never found it, but I did learn of a few things. Mostly from you, Dib._

_I learned that the creature was an Irken, and that there was another Irken here on Earth. Zim. I watched him as he came up with plot after plot to conquer the Earth, and I watched time after time again how you stopped him. You alone Dib._

-----

"An Irken was here…50 years ago?" Dib asked as he starred at the ground.

"Dibbeh talks to himself," Gir laughed, pointing one of his metal fingers at the boy. Dib only glanced at Gir. He didn't really want to pay attention to Zim's robot right now.

"I don't know the Irken's name," Jack said quietly as he pulled out yet another cigarette from his pocket. Jack glanced at Dib, who was staring at the cigarette; an eye cocked. "A great perk about being a ghost; all the smokes I could ever want."

"I guess you won't get cancer anytime soon." Jack chuckled and shook his head.

"Last night, Zim broke into your house." Dib nodded his head. "He tried to pull out a gun on you. The first time he has ever tried such a stunt."

"You were holding it in the holster, weren't you?" Dib asked, an eyebrow raised.

A second passed as Jack took another puff. "Yes." Another puff. "He's getting more violent. Maybe he's just actually forming good schemes for once."

"He's gotten this violent before. He once used a time machine to try to kill me in my past with little pigs."

"Piggies!" Gir shouted.

"Even so," Jack continued, "he's getting more dangerous."

Dib glanced at Gir, who was just staring at the boy with a big smile. "Zim will become more passive again. He's done this before."

A small clump of dirt flew past Dib, and flew right through Jack. The spot that the clump passed through on the ghosts form only released a small wisp of smoke, which quickly filtered out in the nighttime air. All three immediately glanced at the spot where the ball of dirt was thrown from. Dib wasn't surprised to see who it was, and Gir seemed ecstatic about it.

"So you did steal my robot, Dib-stink," a disguised Zim shouted as he walked towards the bench with Dib and Gir. "You thought you could break into Zim's base and steal ZIM's robot and get away with it. HA!"

"I didn't break into your base Zim, and I didn't _steal_ your robot," Dib replied as he crossed his arms. "He came willingly."

"You liiie!" Zim shouted back at Dib, pointed a dirt-covered, gloved claw at him. "Gir, come to Zim!"

The green dog saluted the Irken, and replied in a serious tone, "Yes, my lord!" He quickly went back to 'Gir' mode and ran giddily over to his true master.

"I don't know how you did it, Dib-filth, but you somehow managed to retrieve your memory chip. Give it to me and you might just walk away alive tonight."

"I didn't enter your base today, Zim. It must have been someone else."

"I don't think you're telling me the truth, Dib," Zim retorted, as he slowly advanced towards the boy. "I'm tired of your…actions. You should be bowing to me, not back talking me."

"What are you planning, Zim?" Dib asked as he readied himself for anything the alien might do.

"First, I'd thought that I'd ma-" Zim stopped mid-sentence and step. His face distorted in pain, and his arms wrapped around his gut. The alien fell to his knees and crouched over, mumbling in pain in the process. He looked as if someone just punched him in the gut.

"Z-Zim…" Dib said quietly as he slowly walked towards the alien. "Are you ok?"

"Oh noes," Gir mumbled as a tear came to his eye. "Masta's in pain!"

"S-stop…h-human!" Zim tried to shout. The Irken's arm shot out and grabbed Gir. He pulled the robot close and whispered something in his ear. The robot responded by igniting his thrusters in his feet and threw Zim onto his back. Zim glared at the boy from the robots back. "I-I don't know what you just did, Dib, but I'll find out. Oh how I'll find out." Without sparing a second, Gir flew off into the distance to take his master home.

"I always wanted to do that," Jack laughed from behind Dib. The boy quickly turned around and stared angrily at the man.

"What did you do to him?"

Jack chuckled calmly before replying, "I just pulled on his organs a little bit. I'm sure he'll be fine."

"You can do that!?" Dib replied, taking a step back from the ghost.

"There's a lot I can do…and a lot I can't do." He took the fag out of his mouth and threw it on the ground, stepping on it to put it out. "You act like I'm going to hurt you. You shouldn't worry about that. I'm here to help you." The ghost put his hands in his pockets and turned to walk away. "If you need me, you'll know where to find me." Jack started to fade away as he walked, eventually disappearing from sight, leaving only a boy who was now quite concerned about who he had just made friends with. He turned to leave, and walked down the path.

The clouds in the sky cackled, and light streamed across the sky. Clenched in Dib's hand was the data chip that Jack had retrieved. Maybe Jack will be the turning point for Dib. Maybe now Dib will succeed. "Maybe," Dib said to no one as he walked down the path.

"Maybe," Jack's voice repeated.

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Well…the end. I believe Jack might just appear in a few more stories, but only time will tell. 


End file.
